The Definitive List of 36 #underdog Reasons that the Broncos will win Super Bowl 50!

underdog

@sonobum Inspired and Officially Approved

Why 36?… Because we’re doubling down on 18!

#1.          Panthers haven’t faced a top pass rush nearly all year.  Seattle? – 15th / Arizona? – 27th / Giants? 30th / Atlanta x2 – 32nd / Indy? – 28th / NO x2 – 20th /  Dallas? 16th / GB? – 14th.

#2.          If Cam runs… well, he’ll have some success but he’ll also get the Andrew Luck treatment – e.g. possible lacerated kidney / ‘floating’ rib cartilage.

#3.          Clete Blakeman – the Ref who couldn’t properly flip a coin in Arizona – has been tabbed as the Head Ref for the Super Bowl.  Denver 5-0 in ‘Cletus’ games.  Carolina 2-2.  (Ummm…  How far back did they have to go to find 2 Panthers losses?)

#4.          We have the future President’s ENDORSEMENT!

#5.          We have Son of Bum.

#6.          If you don’t think that’s important – check his twitter feed (work your way past the Gatlin Bros. re-tweet.)

#7.          Over 80% of the money in Vegas is on Carolina.  Who do you think placed a back channel call to the League Office to install Cletus as the Head Ref in this game?

#8           NOBODY BELIEVES IN US!

#9.          Except Cris Collinsworth … Broke down Championship game tape all week.  Went in thinking full court press review would validate picking Carolina by a ton.  Came away picking Denver instead…

#10.       CJ Anderson grew up in Bay Area and was passed Championship torch by Tom Brady after AFC title game – per Peter King ( my interpretation – but it was all there between the lines ;)

#11.       … we’ve all forgotten Cam’s “Global Icon” comment from pre-draft – it’s guaranteed that he and his Jay Z team have not.  Creates the very real possibility of pressing / forcing to below average weapons.  When the pressure really ratcheted up for the ‘perfect season’ – Atlanta happened.  That team exists somewhere inside this Panthers juggernaut.

#12.       Who is actually criticizing Cam Newton?  No one.  If you listen to idiots on Twitter and take their input as meaningful – you are actually the idiot. ( #distraction )

#13.       God is on our side.  And so is Tim Tebow!

#14.       Denver’s Defense was already wrecking people earlier in the week and it was only Monday!

#15.       No explanation necessary.

#16.       Which team is more likely to have players get busted with hookers / get lost on a Tijuana side trip the night before?   The Loose Team or the Scarred Veteran Team?

#17.       Wait – we’re calling an Audible!   Broncos obligatory prostitution sting, over and done by mid-week!

#18.       Who Doesn’t want to see No. 18 go out on top?   … Queue the Lion King sound track… roll with Circle of Life… and Denver sends a second living Legend out on top!

#19.       NOBODY BELIEVES IN US!

#20.       SB 50 is being played on the 7th…

#21.       Thomas Davis is one of Carolina’s three best defenders.  Thomas Davis has a broken arm.  Tanier said it best… “You can’t play Linebacker with a broken arm.”

#22.       Cam voted most likely to be busted with under-cover hookers promising lucrative endorsement deal with GEICO (to rival NationWide / Discount Double Check) in the wee hours of Friday into Saturday morning.

#23.       Good Lord have Mercy -

No benevolent God would place Manning in a position where he felt he had to go and toil under Jeff Fisher to redeem himself.  The moustache might make him run back kick-offs.  Denver wins – Peyton retires in dignity – this byline becomes the tag line for the next SAW movie.

#24.       Manning goes full Jim Bob – nuff said!

#25.       Kubiak the most anonymous coach in Super Bowl history.  Any chance that Elway knew what he was doing considering his track record as a GM so far?

#26.       This Denver Team DESTROYED Green Bay when it was just about putting Owner Pat Bowlen in the Ring of Honor.  Now it’s about making him immortal.

#27.       Teams that went 15 – 1 in during the Regular Season are only 2 – 5 in Super Bowl outings.

#28.       Teams that won by 30+ points in their respective Championship Play-Off Games are only 2 – 6 in the Super Bowl.

#29.       Teams carrying the No.1 ranked Defense into the Super Bowl are 9 – 2 all time in those games…  #sonofbum.

#30.       VEGAS!

#31.       There’s a 33% chance that Wade Phillips is the reincarnation of ‘Rain Man’.

and that Bradley Roby is Tom Cruise.

#32.       If mankind has learned nothing else … we know that history repeats itself

Pretty sure Elway is 90% bionic at this point.  Has hit 3 of 4 with hip and knee replacements … how did his career end again?

 #33.       Carson Palmer was a nuclear level dumpster fire in the NFC Title Tilt … Manning hasn’t thrown a pick since he came back from injury.

#34.       Both End Zones were painted with the Broncos logo – I mean c’mon people – you want signs?!?

#35.       Cortland Finnegan and Robert McClain are the starting corners behind Josh Norman in nickel and dime packages.  Finnegan in McClain were street free agents in November.  Roman Harper is a starting safety for this team and looks older then Ron Rivera.

#36.       Peyton Manning has had some of the worst play-off luck in the history of the NFL.  Peyton Manning is due for some lucky bounces on his last rodeo into the sunset.

 

 

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